My real search began when I was about 13 years old. I contacted Catholic Charities asking to receive information about my birth parents. My first letter wasn't answered, so my mother and I called and got very little information. When I was 17, I contacted them again in hopes that I could learn more. They sent me some non-identifying information about my mother's features and medical history. I stared at those papers for a very long time hoping to find something identifying in there. I truly felt this was a dead end. I always talked about finding her, but never searched any further.

I contacted Catholic Charities again and explained the medical problem and asked if they could help. My caseworker said she would again send non-identifying information. She also said she would send me a few file items I had not yet received. This information said my mom didn't know who the father was and that her relationship with her family was strained. She was from a small town and had decided to move to a big city to find work. It said she had two sisters and a brother, and only one sister knew about me. After receiving this information, I decided to go to court. I had nothing to lose and everything to gain.

On the morning of October 9, 1997, I went to the adoption probate court in Oklahoma City to petition for access to my medical records or my original birth certificate. I arrived at the courthouse at 8:45 a.m. with Dana Delozier, a dear friend, and proceeded to wait for the judge. At 9:10, the judge took me into her chambers and told me how the laws work and that my birth certificate couldn't be released because there was not just cause. I asked if you had to be dying. She explained that there needed to be evidence of a major medical problem. Feeling a bit defeated already, I listened while she told me how or why a person could receive the information. While she explained, I remembered that my children had heart murmurs and thought that might help in some way. When I told her about the kids, she said that a letter from their doctor would be sufficient. She also said she was not aware of any studies on heart murmurs. It wasn't known how dangerous they could be and whether or not the kids would outgrow it. She told me if I could get a letter she could see me again on Friday to consider my request.

I left the chambers at 9:15 a.m. and ran down the stairs of the courthouse to call our family doctor. It was only 7:00 a.m. in Phoenix at the time. My chances of getting hold of a doctor were slim to nil. I called the front line and got a machine. I then called the back line and someone picked up. (Hooray!!!!!!!) I explained that I needed to talk to my doctor immediately, and that I was out-of-state and in court and needed immediate assistance. Dr. Robertson got on the phone and listened attentively while I explained the situation. He kept repeating what I said into his recorder so that it could be dictated and faxed the next day. I didn't have time to wait. I told him it was urgent and he wrote a quick note to the judge and faxed it to Oklahoma county law library. He did that immediately. Within ten minutes, I had his letter scribbled on prescription pad to take into the judge. I went straight upstairs hoping to catch her before she started with someone else. She saw me and came out of chambers. Her response was: "That was fast." I explained the time difference in Phoenix, and that I just got lucky the doctor was there. I asked her if she could please assist me today because I had planned to go to Tulsa the next day. She read the note and said it wasn't as flowery as she would have liked, but that it would do. I was ecstatic!! (I would be willing to bet that if I came back on Friday with a letter that was written on prescription pad she would have denied me the order.)

She took me back into chambers and explained the process I needed to follow to obtain my birth certificate. She then swore me in and I left thanking her for all her help. She was definitely one of my blessed angels. She didn't have to go into so much detail about how one might be able to succeed. I probably would have left and not ever tried again (unless an extreme medical problem had arisen). Dana and I walked over to the county registrar building and filed the court order and got three certified copies of the order. We then drove over to Vital Statistics and requested copies of my original birth certificate. It took about an hour to receive them. What a wait! While sitting in the waiting room, I asked Dana what she thought my mom's name would be. She guessed maybe Linda or Carol. I told her I thought it was Deborah. I'm not sure why, but I just had a funny feeling. When I looked down at the birth certificate, it said my name was Marilyn Rund. My mother's name was Deborah Rund. It also said she had been 20 years old, and it gave me an address. I about passed out when I saw her name on the paper. I think I was in shock that I actually had a legal paper in my hand. I could start my search.

Dana then took me to Catholic Charities so that I could request my file. I was hoping a copy of my birth certificate and a copy of the court order would help me get all the identifying records that would make my search much easier. While we were waiting to be seen, Dana grabbed a phone book and looked up Rund. There were three or four in there from Okarche. (She told me that she would be willing to bet that my mother was from there.) They called me back, but denied my request, stating that I couldn't receive the file without my birth mother's permission. The lady was very nice and even called an attorney to see if she could give me a picture from my file. I felt a little upset, but I figured I should just feel lucky I had a name in my hand. I felt very blessed.

Dana and I were supposed to meet Matt, her son, a close friend of mine, for lunch at 1:00. I hadn't seen him in seven years. I was so excited to tell him all that we had found. We drove to Shawnee and picked Matt up at St.Gregory's University and proceeded to his new home. When we got there, Dana told me to call the first Rund in the book. At 1:20, I dialed Bill and Irene Rund's house. My grandmother answered the phone. I was so nervous and worried. I said that I was looking for Deborah. She told me to hold for a minute.

I was really shaking at this point because I hadn't planned on achieving my goal that quickly. When Deborah answered the phone, I just said the first thing that came to mind--hoping it was correct. "My name is Lori Rourke and I was just down at Catholic Charities trying to locate my medical records because I am in need of surgery. Your name is on my Birth Certificate." She screamed, "it's my daughter!" She then wanted to know exactly where I was. When I told her, she asked if I lived there. I told her I was from Phoenix. She immediately said she wanted to see me. I had no idea how to get anywhere, so I told her to talk to Dana. They decided that we would meet at 3:30.

I was so nervous I was shaking. I didn't know what to think. I hadn't prepared for this or thought it through this far. I knew from my non-identifying information that my grandparents were very uneasy with the situation. Because of this, I was going to pretend to have worked with her at the hospital when I called. The last thing I wanted to do was stir up any trouble or hard feelings. I wasn't sure how anyone was going to react. We went to lunch and then took Matt back to the school. I wanted to get a camera and some flowers so we stopped at two places trying to find just the right things.

One of the first discussions we had was about Pete. I am so thankful that my mother got such a wonderful man. He is genuinely caring and a very enriching person. He was there for my mom through thick and thin. He was her saving grace--one of her blessed angels. If she had decided to keep me, Pete would have been a remarkable father. I am so very proud to call him Dad. When Pete comes into the room it makes your heart warm. I also found out that Pete's mom wanted to adopt me. She helped Debbie recover after my birth. (The blessed part must run in the family.)

We sat in the kitchen and started talking about my search. I found out that I had two brothers and two sisters. My sister Kathy lives in Shawnee. My sister Christy lives in Tennessee with her husband of four years. My brothers Paul and Tony live in Mississippi. Tony just got married in September, and I just missed the wedding.

Pete called my brothers and sisters and let me talk to them. I was totally floored that they were as happy as my mother. My sister Christy couldn't even talk. She was crying and told me how long she had hoped for this moment. I was sorry that she couldn't be there to share the joy in person. Most of that day was a blur to me. I just sat there thinking this wasn't real. I never imagined that it would be that easy to find her or that it would happen like this.

I spent 5 ½ hours with my "new" parents. We tried to ask a lot of questions, but kept getting off on tangents. I found out all the details why my mother gave me up. She explained the circumstances of my birth. She desperately wanted to keep me, but didn't want to hinder me if bad circumstances were to arise. I am very comfortable with her decision and harbor no ill will. I wanted her to know how thankful I was to be born. I feel that God has chosen the right time for us to have met. He has worked wonders in both of our lives. We are certainly living examples of his work. I am very proud to have a mother that is so compassionate and loving.

Now before I go on, I need to point out all the ironies that have happened.

First, I flew out of Phoenix at 8:20 p.m. on Wednesday night. The weather was not good and there was a fear that the plane might be delayed. While in the air, I saw the most beautiful light show. There was a constant light. It lasted about 15-20 minutes. It happened right before we landed. For about 45 seconds, our plane had turbulence. In other words, the flight was perfect and God must have been trying to tell me something.

Second, I had four negative episodes that easily could have detoured me in my search:

1. The judge didn't accept my original doctor's letter.

2. Dr. Robertson just happened to be there at 7:00 a.m.

3. The judge had a 10:00 cancellation which allowed her to see me Thursday instead of Friday.

4. Catholic Charities denied my request.

Third, I called the first number in the book and found her at her mother's house visiting. Five minutes later they would have been gone. They were all standing in the same place, grandpa's workshop, when I called and they were looking at three angels.

Fourth, Matt worked at St.Gregory's. He was a very close friend and had known my sister for three years. They too were very close.

Fifth, My sister Cathy had called my house and talked to my husband, because he is an alumnus of St. Greg's. She was calling for a donation to the school.

When Dana and I had left to meet my mother, we passed some girls (students) jogging out of the drive. One of the girls had stopped to tie her shoe.That was my sister!

Sixth, my mother's sister Karen has known me for 23 years. She was my vacation bible school teacher. I played with my cousin Becky and didn't even know it. Karen kept her suspicions from the whole family until October 9, 1997. She assumed I was Debbie's daughter when I was about five years old because I told her I was adopted and gave her my birth date (which was also her parents' anniversary). She also says that I looked and acted just like Debbie as a child. She must have been watching over me because she knew details about my life even after they changed parishes. I don't remember Karen or Becky. I do remember vacation bible school, but not the teachers.

Now I can continue. I had already planned to see my mom and dad in Tulsa. My mom and dad knew about my search and knew how I longed to find my medical information and my heritage. They were excited and supportive to find out this information. I think my mom had reservations at first because it was a slight threat, but she hardly expressed them. I felt very positive reinforcement from them. I have always known how much they love me. I, as every young girl, had tense times growing up. But they never dismissed my feeling about my biological mother. They said they always understood. I grew up with their biological children--my brother and sister. They were all as shocked as I that it all happened so quickly. My uncle Paul took me to find a video camera so that I could capture my birth mom on film. My whole family was supportive. Unfortunately my husband and children weren't there to help me celebrate. When Sean, my husband, found out he was amazed at my six-hour ordeal. He was elated! My search had finally ended. I could be at peace about all the facts I longed for.

On Saturday morning, my brother Tony (a.k.a. Pete II) arrived from Mississippi with his new wife. What a delightful surprise! On Saturday night, I arrived at Debbie and Pete's house at 11:00 p.m. We stayed up until 3:30 a.m. talking and trying to figure out how and why everything happened the way it did. We went through everything from medical history to habits.

I found out that my mother has the same eyes, cheeks, chin, nose, hands, and toes. We both are cosmetologists; we even laugh alike. My husband always teases me about my silent laugh. When I get really tickled I can't make a sound. I just laugh silently and usually end up crying. My mother also has this hilarious trait. We even chose Marie as our confirmation names.

She wears her hair the exact way I wore mine for eight years. I am letting my hair grow because of a bet, which I should win any time now, otherwise they would have been really floored when they saw me. I would look almost identical with my hair short!

We both have similar health problems. She has already had a hysterectomy. We both have the same attitudes and viewpoints. She is just as impatient as I am. We are very firm in our opinions, which isn't always a good thing. Both married big men (Teddy Bears). We both have a happy, healthy marriage to men that aren't judgmental about our pasts. It is a remarkable mirror image that never ceased to amaze me.

I also have 10 new aunts and uncles, and God knows how many cousins!

I have to say that I never would have imagined a story like this one. I feel so very blessed! My life has come full circle. I have a wonderful husband, two beautiful children, and two "real" moms.